There Was A Shift

In the last couple of months something started changing for me, or in me maybe. It had nothing to do with the outside world though, I think something just shifted inside of me. I didn’t suddenly decide I wanted to be a size 2 or have a six pack. I didn’t look at someone else and think “I want that.” I didn’t decide to start some diet health program where I follow some diagram or system to help you lose weight. Those are all things I’d done many many many times in the past and they never really worked. This time, it was something entirely different, something I don’t think I could explain with charts and diagrams, it’s just a shift.

I’ve had weight problems my whole life, it’s part of my genes and I deal with a lot of medical things that make losing weight really hard such as my hypothyroidism. Others problems include my job, my commute, my back pain and my sicatica/LCS in my leg. However, I started back on My Fitness Pal again, which I’ve done before, but this time for some reason I really decided to put in every single meal, even the not so good ones, after every single meal. I know that if I forget to put in a day of meals I will end up not tracking anymore at all.

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I started going to the gym regularly again and just trying to get more cardio but this last week I couldn’t do anything really because of my sciatica/LCS (I can barely walk at times much less run, there is some kind of nerve/muscle issue and I don’t want to make it worse). However it seems just being more aware of what I’m eating and deciding not to eat certain things based on what I’d eaten that day seems to have made a big difference.

August 6th

I admit I am eating more fruits and veggies than normally but not that much more than before. I’m drinking more water but not that much more water. I’m not really giving up any food, just being mindful. I don’t need to be some fit girl anymore that’s a size 2, I just want to feel healthy and good about myself. So far I’m definitely feeling better about myself and healthier, hopefully when I get this back/sciatica thing under control I’ll be able to take this up a notch but I think it’s good I don’t try to do too much too quickly.

Oh, did I mention, I’ve lost 16 lbs from my heaviest weight a few months ago? Yup.

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My Life – One Day at a Time

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  • Right now I’m reading The Spectacular Now and loving it, it’s reminding me of reading One Day and I looooooved that book, read it several times now. I just really hope I don’t end up curled up in a ball and sobbing at the end like with the latter book.
  • I had some horrible thigh pain this week that made it hard to walk or even move my leg but it’s mostly gone now. I am planning to go back to the gym tomorrow even though my Chiro said no elliptical or treadmill but I think the treadmill will be ok. I figure that not exercising isn’t good either and I can’t walk outside everyday. Plus, I get a better workout at the gym.
  • My show Skins is over and I’m sad but I think it’s time to let it go and by let it go I mean just continually watch the old episodes over and over and over again.
  • On the plus side Breaking Bad is coming back on Sunday. I can’t decide if I should go watch it at one of Manly Man’s friend’s houses or just wait to see it on Monday. If I watch it at their place and they piss me off during it it’s not going to be pretty.
  • I finished The Sopranos and don’t know if I want to write up a post now comparing it to Breaking Bad or wait until Breaking Bad is over? I mean, it’s only 8 more episodes. ::sniff::
  • Sometimes I think I really want to have friends over or go see friends and then I think, no, I think I’ll lay in my hammock or go to my beach instead. Just thinking about dealing with people makes me tired.
  • Speaking of people, family, sigh. Can I just move to England now and just give up on being close to my family?